Monday, September 29, 2008

A touch of grey, a little lest angst

I attended my High School reunion this weekend. I grew up in a town weird enough to freak Hunter S. Thompson out, but my High School experience was pretty average. Like many, I struggled in High School, not academically, but socially. I made pretty good grades, but I didn't fit in with the "brainiacs." I played sports, but I also could hang with the hippies. My parents didn't make enough money for me to be with the "ins" but they invited me to a few of their parties because I could make people laugh.

At my 10 year reunion, everyone looked great. There was a lot of sexual tension in the air. We were still young and we were taking on the world. I had a good time at the Friday night mixer that year but ran from the Saturday night dinner dance like a republican at an ethics class.

At my 20 year reunion, people were a little more relaxed, but there was still a little more one-up-man-ship than was comfortable for me.

At this reunion (30) the conversations focused on family, kids, taking care of elderly parents, non-profit work and of course, politics. I was nervous as I walked up to the restaurant/bar where it was being held. Will I know anyone? I did know quite a few folks. I hooked up with some dear friends I had lost contact with and we are back in touch. I saw myself through the eyes of people who hadn't seen me in 30 years, and I liked the feedback I was given. I wasn't really looking for validation, just connection, so the former was gravy.

One of the most interesting moments of the night came for me when I talked to Danny Fromhart. Danny and I were on the wrestling team together as freshman. In a scrimmage match, I broke Danny's arm and he never wrestled again. For the past 30 years, Rick McGough has tormented me with comments like "Danny would have been a pro baseball player, but you screwed that up," or "Danny's coming (to the 10 and 20 year reunions) and he wants to get even." When I talked to Danny, he said Rick had been goading him in the same way for all these years. We both agreed that McGough was an asshole and had a nice time talking and catching up on life.

The last half hour I was at the party, I was talking to a group of cheerleaders and thinking to myself how funny it is that 30 years ago I wouldn't have had the courage to talk to this group. I like being the age I am. Time is sort of an equalizer. I imagine at the 40 year reunion those of us fortunate to still be "among the quick" will be mostly talking about retirement and our health. I'll be there.