Coming Clean

If you've visited this blog before, you might notice that some of the posts are missing. An old friend from College "googled" me and found my website. He read the blog, then contacted my brother and told him he agreed with me on the issue of Terry Schiavo. My brother read the blog, and he was understandably hurt by the words I had written. I sent my brother an apology in email form, then removed the posts that had been judgemental and cruel toward him. I didn't do it because I agree any more now than before with him on the right people have to meddle in other's affairs. I deleted them because I had asked him to keep our debate between ourselves, then I proceeded to publish it to the world. That wasn't right.

I wish I had stopped at the email. I called and left a message with my niece, and Stephan called me back tonight. Instead of just sticking to my ammends, I attacked him for his religious beliefs. I realized tonight that I need to do quite a bit of work to clean up my side of the street. I have divorced myself from the Catholic church, and I have found a spiritual path that works for me, but that doesn't give me the right to judge someone else because he or she believes in that church and is zealous about their faith. I need to find a way to forgive the Catholic Church. I need to do the same thing for the Bush
Administration. I'm not talking about agreeing with everything they represent. I'm talking about turning that anger into compassion and spending my time envisioning the best possible life and spiritual path for every elder in the Catholic church and for W himself. I was pretty sick when I got off the phone with my brother, but I think this had to happen to kickstart my process of reconciliation with my family and with some big institutions.

I'm on my way to San Francisco for my last trip as a Job Corps Project Manager. I am going out to Santa Cruz on Friday to visit with Chris Samuels and his lovely family. I've yet to meet the new baby, and I am excited about that. I have tickets for the "Drive by Truckers" on Saturday night at the Filmore. I also plan to visit my old yoga instructor Amber at the "Funky Door" in Berkely. It should be a fun week. Hopefully I can keep my mouth shut next time I have a strong opinion about someone's religious beliefs. It is none of my business!

I'm grateful that I get to get up tomorrow and try my best again. Life is an amazing gift!